!

Martha is dead

I need to say it aloud to make it real.

This is an almost friend of mine…..

We had less than a year to get to know each other

But we made similar life choices and lived in similar worlds

I cannot console myself

and still I do not comprehend the grief that overwhelms me

I appreciate the Buddhist precepts more

Because this happened here

But I am denied the option of respect for the dead I know

Forced to confront the reality of impermanence

Embrace life: It may be all you have

I cannot console myself

and still I do not comprehend the grief that overwhelms me

I do not want to cloak it in euphemisms

I wish she had been happier here

I regret the indecision, the inaction

I hear the loudness, the easy laugh and the exclamations

I cannot console myself

and still I do not comprehend the grief that overwhelms me

I wish you peace and know that it is no longer possible

Lessons have been learnt at your expense

Flags will fly in your honour

Lamps will salute your wit, your tenacity, your hutzpah!

I cannot console myself

and still I do not comprehend the grief that overwhelms

Embrace life: It may be all you have

  

********************************************

Madam Martha as you were wont to say

“Where is the family brain today?”

They drove you mad but didn’t drive you away

That happened when you died today.