10 Highlights
1 Returning to Bhutan to teach and realising I still have that magic in the classroom and enjoy the interactions with the kids more than ever, was an unexpected plus.
2 Keeping the connection with new and old friends and making new acquaintances of vastly different ages, races and beliefs was a real blessing.
3 Reuniting with Lhendup and Thinley and spending time with them and their wives brought us both so much joy.
4 Traveling across Bhutan from west to east, for a month, revisiting old haunts and new locations and sharing part of that journey with Barry really helped me to recover from the financial, emotional, social, physical and mental health impact of teaching there again.
5 Initiating having three Bhutanese movies screened at Meta House, all of which drew good crowds and connected us to more likeminded people, made me feel more in touch with this community.
6 Doing some simple home renovations and improvements added to my sense of belonging.
7 Having many guests and visitors in Phnom Penh was fantastic.
8 Attempting to teach an adult to swim and seeing vast improvement in terms of confidence in the water, was very rewarding.
9 Having both my sister and brother here in Phnom
Penh at the same time was long overdue and a big plus.
10 Seeing the Royal Ballet perform for the first time early in the year and again later in the year gave me a new insight into the Khmer culture.
5 Disappointments
1 Realising that despite the joy of upgrading my skills, embracing more technology in the classroom and making real connections with kids, I will never choose to be a full time classroom teacher again.
2 Finances are tighter than ever even though we are more frugal and prioritize how, where and when we spend.
3 Traveling less both internationally and within Cambodia does nothing for my wellbeing.
4 Compared to last year there have been many fewer alcohol free days even though the quantity being consumed is much less. That’s a habit we need to readopt.
5
…… how lucky am I I can only think of 4 disappointments
3 Game Changers
1 Deciding to visit Australia next year and making the prepayments of many the expenses required is both motivating and an achievable way to make it happen for us.
2 Joining the Phnom Penh Sports Club and playing table tennis and swimming there regularly has had huge mental and physical health benefits.
3 Writing more, reflecting more and continuing to remain both analytical and sensitive are not a choice but a necessity for me.
3 Areas of Focus
1 Committing to not following a routine but to mixing it up, deciding in the present, choosing to learn and grow and living more mindfully brings huge benefits.
2 A simple, slow, sustainable and safe lifestyle really takes a huge ongoing commitment and more effort but is more important than ever.
3 Understanding that if you don’t stand up for the things you believe in, you will be forced to brace yourself for a life lived under the tyranny of the powerful and mindless dictators of our times. Words without action are only hot air.
3 Things I forgot
1 The Bhutanese system and especially the educational one is based on rank, privilege, class and bias and having forgotten that had a very negative impact on me. Having grown up in a working class family it just doesn’t sit well with me.
2 The best way to lose a friendship is to lend or borrow money. Like oil and water, money and friends never mix.
3 When you fail to see the perspective of others you fail to become your best self.
Reflections
Much of what has preceded this is already very reflective and it’s a daily practice for me these days. Nonetheless I am finally beginning to feel more comfortable in my own skin and able to step out of my comfort zone, take risks and even fail without persecuting myself or becoming lost and anxious. I am learning to embrace my weaknesses and to focus on what I want to change rather than what others would like me to change.
Yes I’m sensitive. It’s a trait I value. I am and continue to respect that even when no one else does. Having almost lost myself in many previous disasters, I refuse to allow anyone to attempt to alter me to suit their needs.
I remain true to me. I endure not only because I’m not a quitter but because I have a work ethic, discipline and well balanced sense of the me I need to be.
An extract from my May 4th journal
“I will do my best to survive and endure whatever comes next and endeavor to not get upset or react, regardless of the injustice of the judgements or inadequacies and shortcomings in my performance implied.
The need to have all the team present and call upon higher office bearers too if necessary, once again reinforces the rank, privilege, compliance and authority mentality that is the real foundation of the system.
The hard working, principled, working class kid with a background and faith in unionism in me, baulks at this. Again I come to the realisation that I cannot afford Bhutan”
